Getting Out of Your Own Way

Let's talk about self-imposed roadblocks.

There is no shortage of roadblocks to making progress on the things you wish to accomplish in life. Insufficient resources (money, materials, time). Insufficient knowledge. Insufficient skill in a particular area. The list goes on! But I find the most costly roadblocks I encounter on a regular basis are ones that are self-manufactured and self-imposed.

On the surface, internal roadblocks seem like they should be easy to identify and fix. After all, who knows you better than you?! But I think they are actually the hardest ones to address because of two big things:

1. Honesty

2. Fear

It’s difficult to be honest with yourself about which roadblocks are self-imposed because you put those roadblocks in place to protect yourself! It’s quite an efficient little self-preservation ecosystem—something bad happens, so you put a story in place to protect you from enduring a future instance of this scary scenario. Your brain is just trying to help you out! But when these limitations no longer serve you, they may stick around and turn into stories that are no longer true and manifest as self-imposed limitations.

Now, while I’m firmly striving to embrace limitations—particularly in ways that fuel creativity (think: limited materials, time, etc.) or foster wellness (think: ample rest, taking breaks when needed, etc.)—I only want to embrace limitations that are real, not based on false stories I’ve told myself over the years. This is easier said than done!

Sometimes I think of these roadblocks as “the resistance”—an internal force that whispers mean things like…

“Why bother?”
“You have nothing interesting to say anyway”
“Don’t post that online. Nobody cares!”
“Why are you wasting SO much time drawing and writing these random things?!”

This type of negative internal monolog leads to self-sabotage, like NOT posting the thing, not allowing myself to make the thing in the first place, not finishing the thing I started, etc.

Other times, my roadblocks show up in the form of excuses. Self-manufactured stories about what I can and can’t do because of all sorts of “truths” I’ve internalized about myself and the world around me. I know a lot of these stories are created out of self-preservation and driven by fear. And yet they persist!

So, in my quest to fight with myself less, I made this zine.

My personal discovery while making this zine was that I can’t escape myself! (Duh.) To quote one of my Dad’s famous phrases, “Everywhere you go, there you are!” This made me giggle as a kid, but as an adult I think there’s more to unpack in this seemingly simple phrase. The idea that you are you—for better or worse—wherever you go is sort of profound. You can’t run away from yourself. No matter where you go, there you are.

With all of this in mind, I suspect the solution to self-imposed roadblocks isn’t avoidance or suppressing part of yourself. What if a better approach is to be honest with yourself, embrace your current state, and collaborate with your whole self instead?

Thanks for reading!

Thanks for being here! It truly means the world to me. In case you missed it, last week I shared some intentions for 2023 around inviting imperfection and embracing limitations. Check it out here.

Paid subscribers also get access to printable versions of “Roadblocks” as a zine and one-page comic art print!